


Silence (Revisted)

by Headphone_Love



Series: Let's See Some Change [10]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hurt Hinata Shouyou, Hurt/Comfort, Internal Conflict, M/M, Not many tags to avoid spoiling plot, Protective Kageyama Tobio, References to Depression, Third Year Hinata Shouyou and Kageyama Tobio
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-08
Updated: 2020-04-08
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:55:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23545744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Headphone_Love/pseuds/Headphone_Love
Summary: In 2016, I wrote a story called Silence when I first joined the fandom.I would like to revisit that much simpler time.------It was only when seeing the droplets fall into the bucket one by one did he recall his phone beginning to buzz right before the downpour. He pulled out his phone with icy hands and skimmed his messages.(5:40) Hey
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Series: Let's See Some Change [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/747993
Comments: 10
Kudos: 141





	Silence (Revisted)

**Author's Note:**

> 115 edits and two hours later, this version was created.   
> How weird lol.

Hinata sat on the roof watching as each gray cloud went by. His eyes burned and watered, only closing when the feeling became too much. His heart fluttered inside his chest in random bursts, the combination of pressure and hollowness disconcerting. It caused his breathing to stutter from time to time, almost forcing him to sit up to get it under control. 

Almost. 

Opening his eyes again, he ignored the burning in his limbs from remaining in his current position and parted his lips to let some air out. He could feel the force of it, along with the rattling in his chest that he wasn’t sure truly existed. The freezing he felt in his bones was leaking out slowly, slipping onto his skin and causing a shiver to leave his frame. No matter how often he tried expressing it, no one ever understood. 

A cold drop against his cheek had him shutting his eyes again, and for a moment Hinata wondered where the drop had come from. 

Then another drop hit him against his already moist forehead, slipping down and narrowly missing his eye. 

Then another, against his arm—against his hair—before an onslaught of drops made it hard to keep track of where he’d been hit. The humming in the distance remained unnoticed as his cell phone began to buzz in his pocket. He ignored it, in favor of being pelted with the rain. It was obvious, it was clear what was happening. Feeling had become both comforting and terrifying when it used to only be the latter. 

When his phone went off again, Hinata’s brow scrunched, but he once again let it buzz until it stopped. 

Except it didn’t this time, and the thought that it was probably Kageyama caused his breath to stutter again, though for a different reason this time. No matter how long he ignored it, it continued to buzz as Hinata’s lips pressed into a thin line. 

Again

_ Again  _

**Again.**

Lighting shot across the sky, Hinata’s eyes widening as he shot into a seated position. He raised a hand to his chest, always having known to go inside before the storms got to such a point. His jaw clenched as he took a handful of his shirt tightly into his grip. He shut his eyes for a moment, letting the fabric go to collect his items instead. 

His phone had somehow managed to distract him so much that he hadn’t seen the obvious signs: the darker clouds, the way the wind had begun to pick up and bend the rain to its will. 

Crap. 

Hinata turned to stare off the roof to confirm his suspicions, noticing how the city had become a ghost town in a matter of minutes. Everyone was most likely inside or on their way to being inside like he should be, he mused. It was only the sensical thing to do, yet ask anyone about Hinata and they would probably say that Hinata was the most nonsensical person out there. 

Well, maybe they would. A lot had changed, after all. 

Shaking his head, Hinata turned to leave the roof, noticing the extra rain the rain had added once he was on his way down the stairs. His hair clung to his forehead and the back of his neck. His clothes hung heavily against his thin frame, making him more careful than usual as he descended towards the ground floor. It would be embarrassing if he injured himself going down the stairs. 

The hall was empty save for Hinata, his eyes locking onto whatever he could see as his fingers slid gently across the railing. The crack in the paint was the first thing he’d noticed, eyes flickering in amusement. It would probably remain there even after he graduated, maybe even after the underclassman and their kouhais graduated. 

Next was the bucket in the corner of one of the stairways collecting droplets that seemed to travel inside from a weak spot. No matter how much dropped, it did an effective job at catching them all, and if any did manage to miss they dried almost instantly once they hit the concrete floor.

It was only when seeing the droplets fall into the bucket one by one did he recall his phone beginning to buzz right before the downpour. He pulled out his phone with icy hands and skimmed his messages.

(5:40) Hey

(5:59) Did you get home safely?

(6:30) Your mother called and said you never showed up. This isn’t funny, Hinata.

(6:49) Oi.

(7:00) Im at school. Where the hell are you?

A ghost of a smile graced his lips. Not because he took joy in worrying Kageyama, but because he was glad that his dramatics hadn’t changed since their first year. He kept the phone in his hand tightly as he headed towards the front entrance, walking leisurely as he took in the school building. When it was full of students, there wasn’t much chance to see everything, but now it was eerily still. In passing, he could see one or two students walking around, but they didn’t notice him far too focused on what Hinata assumed was conversation. 

Walking out, he took in a deep breath and exhaled slowly, eyes closing at the action. The droplets began to hit his skin again, much colder than he remembered, but they were gone again not even a second later. Hinata opened his eyes, spotting the black umbrella now over him. He turned, Kageyama staring at him looking irritated at most. Hinata’s eyes brightened, a grin slowly making a way onto his lips. He waved sheepishly, but Kageyama simply rolled his eyes at the action. 

Then, a warm arm was wrapped around him while the other kept the umbrella over them both. He could feel Kageyama’s heavy breathing against his neck and felt his shoulders go slack. He raised his hands slowly tapping Kageyama’s back before allowing his hands to settle. They drew circles until Kageyama managed to relax to the point of no longer trembling. 

Hinata felt him pull away reluctantly, hands remaining on his shoulders as he scanned him for a second. Blue eyes, once satisfied and able to confirm Hinata was not injured in any way, met Hinata’s gaze. Kageyama’s irritation turned into a variety of emotions that were far too fast in changing for Hinata to pick up on. He could see Kageyama part his lips for a moment before they pressed into a thin line again. 

Hinata’s eyes went glassy for a moment, guilt gnawing at his chest. 

A stuttered breath and a sad smile. 

Kageyama’s gaze softened, head tilting back as he let out a deep exhale. He grabbed Hinata’s hands, forcing the other to hold the umbrella for a moment and removed his jacket. Hinata parted his lips, but Kageyama shot him a stern look in warning and wrapped the item around him anyway. Despite the disapproving look, Hinata accepted it and grunted. When Kageyama moved to take the umbrella, Hinata held it away from him, nose scrunching as he stuck his tongue out at him. 

With a look of disbelief, Kageyama’s eyes narrowed. 

Hinata knew better than to give in, those eyes being one of the only things he had studied in all his time at Karasuno. He had memorized those eyes, from how they narrowed when Kageyama was thinking hard about something and crinkled when he was excited. How they shined whenever milk was gifted to him or flickered deviously when a meat bun was involved. 

But they would also lighten and ease into peace whenever he was happy—genuinely happy. They’d become darker, almost black when he was sad, growing glossy. 

And when he was scared, which Hinata had only seen a handful of times in all his time of knowing Kageyama, they’d become untamed and wild: pleading to whoever would hear for an answer to the problem but fading when he realized no one was. 

Hinata felt a hand against his cheek and looked up, not having realized he had begun to cry until glossy eyes met his own. His throat tightened at the sight. Kageyama looked away first, hand moving to wrap around his shoulders. He allowed Kageyama to pull him close until they were practically hugging again beneath the umbrella. Kageyama led them away from the school, Hinata leaning against him heavily and doing his best to keep his eyes from closing. 

Kageyama was warm. 

He always had been, despite popular belief.

There was no conversation as there once had been, but there were a lot of looks of assurance and soft smiles that meant more than Hinata could ever explain. Even when they reached Hinata’s house at the top of the mountain, it was obvious that Kageyama wouldn’t be forced to leave. 

So Kageyama nodded despite no question being asked, entering the cozy home with Hinata and helping him with his duffle. 

He sucked in a deep breath when he was pulled into a hold that wasn’t Kageyama’s eyes wide and panicked before he felt how much the person was trembling as they held him. 

His mother. 

Taking in a deep breath, he turned and wrapped his arms around her tightly. She stroked his hair, pressed her cheek to it and was probably saying something that he couldn’t decipher. Her sobs were enough to even have Kageyama stepping in, and the reality of what he’d done sunk like a rock in deep waters. 

He made her worry a lot lately despite all he tried to make her understand that he would be alright. 

After she calmed, she forced them both to shower, making them eat and even setting up Hinata’s room for Kageyama’s stay. It was a whirlwind of movement, Hinata feeling as if he had blinked and he was going from soaked at his front door to warm and lying in bed with Kageyama gazing at him knowingly. Natsu entered shortly after to say goodnight, kissing both their cheeks and squishing Hinata’s cheeks together in a way that had him smiling. 

Once she was gone, Kageyama stood to switch off the lights, room plunging into darkness. Hinata’s eyes went wide as he sat up, only for a hand to press against his chest: careful and attentive. 

His eyes wandered, searching in the darkness until they finally met familiar blue. 

Hinata laid back down slowly, Kageyama following until they were lying on their sides and staring at each other. 

Hinata raised a hand, starting at Kageyama’s forehead and sliding his fingers down his nose, stopping at his lips. A smile formed slightly as his heart returned to its normal pattern. Hinata had always liked Kageyama’s lips, even more so now all things considered. He ran his thumb across the bottom lip, feeling it drag and feeling as Kageyama began to smile at the action. Feeling embarrassed at the bold act, he went to move his hand away only for Kageyama to grab it gently. 

His eyes were narrowed, but Hinata knew it was just the other being playful.

Kageyama moved the hand close to his lips again, proceeding to kiss each fingertip. When he was done, he pressed his lips to Hinata’s palm, never looking away. 

Hinata let out a broken whine at the feeling. 

Lacing their hands together, Kageyama hugged their joined hands against his chest. Hinata could feel his heartbeat due to the action, face warming at the intimacy of this all. He hadn’t ever expected to be like this with anyone, let alone Kageyama Tobio. His mind flashed back to their first meeting in that school hallway: to how daunting the entire meeting had felt. 

And yet here he was with an equally daunting situation but with someone beside him rather than against him. 

Hinata moved closer, feeling the other’s heartbeat become a bit faster at the action. Pride surged through him at the fact he was able to cause a reaction like that. He shut his eyes and pressed a careful kiss against the other’s forehead, backing away only to feel a kiss pressed against the corner of his lips. The grin on his lips was instantaneous.

Shifting to get more comfortable, Kageyama rested an ear against Hinata’s chest while Hinata ran a hand through his hair lazily. He could feel his eyes drooping in exhaustion, not having enough energy to be surprised at that fact. Sleep wasn’t something that came easy to him, but with Kageyama, he knew he’d wake up with someone there. 

With  _ warmth _ . 

Kageyama sat up, looking down at him for a moment. 

Then his lips began to move. 

Hinata sucked in a breath, moving to shift but being forced into remaining where he was. He felt his heart stutter and stop over and over,  _ again and again _ as he shook his head and looked anywhere but Kageyama. It wasn’t until he caught sight of Kageyama’s eyes: wide and pleading—

His eyes watered, lip threatening to quiver.

And then he broke, Hinata letting out a sob as he fought Kageyama even harder, not wanting to see his lips moving when he couldn’t make out the words being said. He pulled Kageyama back to him, face in his neck as he dug his nails into the other’s shirt. No matter how hard he cried, how much stress he could feel in his throat under, no sound ever seemed to escape. 

No sound seemed to leave anyone’s mouth anymore. 

Hinata could feel Kageyama rubbing his thumbs against his hips in an attempt to calm, but he only cried harder. With how Kageyama tensed, he knew he probably sounded awful: voice no doubt cracking under the force of his sorrow. He kept a grip on Kageyama's shirt as if it were the only thing keeping him bound to reality, Hinata fearing the moment he had to close his eyes.

Kageyama moved so he was hovering over Hinata, so close that it would be impossible for the other to avoid him. He leaned down and pressed a kiss against his hair, whispering if the movement of his lips told Hinata anything. He pulled away after the gesture, Hinata’s gaze moving from his eyes down to his lips. Kageyama repeated the words several times, making sure to say them slowly to avoid overwhelming him.

'Just because you can't hear me anymore doesn't mean I’ll let you disappear, idiot.'

Hinata was sure he managed to laugh at the words by how Kageyama’s eyes brightened. He gave a weak shove, but Kageyama didn’t budge, a grin forming on his lips at the action. While Hinata was aware that Kageyama didn't care about how he could no longer hear him, it didn't stop it from hurting any less.

His smile dimmed. 

He would never hear when the birds chirped early in the morning anymore, or how the trains rattled as they passed. Gone were the days of distant chatter as he rode his bike down towards his school, or the way store owners would call to him from their shops. He couldn't ever hear Kageyama and the team cheering when they won games, or the roar of the crowd when they did their quick.

He wouldn’t hear Natsu singing along to the radio early in the morning, or his mother's laughter at her off-tune vocals. Hinata wouldn’t hear when Kageyama would laugh at his idiotic stunts or call him so they could practice more.

He would never hear when anyone told him that they loved him, the emotion in their voices falling on his now deaf ears. Hinata supposed that was the most painful because the tones of how one spoke were directly related to who they were and how they felt when using said tones. 

Effectively ruining his mood at the negativity, Hinata turned his head to stare at the wall that he had become sickeningly familiar with over the last few months. 

"Over…” Hinata tried to say, unsure of whether the word was correct or not. It felt correct, but he knew just how hard it was to talk when there was nothing to hear. He continued, not knowing if Kageyama was even listening. “over...over... now nothing," he finished weakly. He wondered whether he deserved this, unable to stop himself from wondering  _ why _ . Had he done something wrong? 

Kageyama moved so he was no longer hovering, pulling at Hinata’s wrist to force him to sit as well. When Hinata talked himself into looking at Kageyama, he tensed at the other’s gaze. Kageyama could always read him like a book, but he had never truly agreed until all this had happened. It wasn’t as if Hinata hadn’t been an open book already, but no one else had picked up on how much Hinata hated the silence even when he could hear. It made him fidget more, become restless easier. No one else understood how heavy a blow losing his hearing completely had been and how it had nearly driven him over the edge. 

Kageyama gave him a look, then without much warning, leaned in to kiss him. Hinata must have let out a sound because Kageyama only deepened it until Hinata’s tears had dried and his only focus was the setter making his face feel warm and flushed. Hinata’s arms snaked their way around his neck and moved through his hair, the vibration that left Kageyama enough to let Hinata know what sound he’d made. 

When Hinata pulled away for air, he could see that Kageyama’s usually neat hair was now messy, laughing quietly at the look. Kageyama laughed as well, looked both sated and relieved. He raised his hands slowly, Hinata tilting his head curiously but waiting where he sat patiently.

'I know you overthinking and making yourself sad.' Kageyama spoke slowly, hands moving in sync with his words. Hinata nodded slowly, biting his lip as he raised his own hands in front of him.

'Sorry' he signed after a moment to think. He was still learning, so remembering the signs was a bit difficult considering his hiatus from anything study-related. He had wanted to just remain silent after what had happened instead of learning. 

His teammates—both old and new—refused to humor the idea, however. 

"You don't need to be sorry. Just don't let this control your entire life, Shouyou." 

Hinata sucked in a breath at the use of his first name, embarrassed at how it made him feel. He huffed, crossing his arms. "I'm not," he said aloud, Kageyama's eyes going wide. He pulled Hinata in close as if he’d been waiting to hear his voice for quite some time. 

"I, Love, You, Hinata Shouyou." 

The shocks just kept coming, it seemed, as he’d never heard Kageyama say those words to him despite their years of being together. He supposed he still hadn’t technically heard, but the message was one he’d gotten loud and clear. 

Hinata felt the tears spill over for the nth time that day, offering a bright smile and laughing in relief as the feeling in his chest slowly warmed, the pressure remaining but easing itself slowly. 

Kageyama chuckled, Hinata reaching out to his chest to feel the action against his palm. A moment later, he kissed Kageyama again.

Again.

And once more, relishing in the pink that stained the setter’s cheeks before parting his lips. 

There was still silence, but the expression on Kageyama’s face showed the words had reached their target. 

"I love you Ka-ge-ya-ma To-bi-o." 


End file.
